Black clouds circling my head

Right now I'm feeling kinda strange and I'm not even sure where it's come from. I've been doing really well the past few months despite being put through the wringer back in June and having to deal with what can only be describes as something horrific.

I don't know if I've basically just come out of Auto-pilot and now dealing with it, the shitty weather that's now upon us which always depresses me, the pressure piling on in regards to my final year at University, moving into a new home or all of the above. 

All I know is it is becoming increasingly difficult to listen to everyone else tell me to hold my head up, it'll be okay or to even listen to people with their problems which sounds really selfish. But as the days go on, Im finding it so hard to even care. 

I've even found myself in a situation I have avoided for what I think is a year or so of me trying to stay out of for fear or complications out of my control. But no, because I've let my guard slip I'm now right where I didn't want to be and the damn vicious circle isn't letting me off.

None of this makes sense to you, maybe because I can't make sense of it myself. All I know that if this continues, I don't know if I'll be here anymore.